‘You might be so fearful in regards to the future, which you can’t stay within the current’
Ex-professional rugby participant Lennon Greggains says gamers want extra assist when being let go from Welsh areas, after his psychological well being hit an all-time-low when his Dragons RFC profession ended aged 25.
Greggains, now 26, joined the Dragons Academy at 15, and the prospect of him taking part in rugby for a residing was a dream come true to the as soon as eight-year-old boy who began taking part in for NHSOB on the weekends rising up.
For some time, Greggains was one among former coach Dean Ryan’s favourites, signing his first professional contract in 2017 aged 18, and frequently being picked for the squad as he represented Wales in all age teams.
Then, catastrophe struck. In the summertime of 2019 he tore his ACL in the course of the pre-season, and from that time on issues had been by no means the identical.
Greggains confronted set-back after set-back, harm after harm, taking a nasty blow to the forearm earlier than breaking each of his shoulders within the years following.
He says he didn’t put together for the top of his profession, and neither did any of his friends, as a result of they merely focussed every part they’d on the game from the minute they acquired given the prospect.
It was his way of life, his id, his goal. When it was over, Greggains misplaced himself. He describes how in the course of the transition his nervousness acquired so extreme, he was experiencing frequent panic assaults and would go to mattress at evening dreading having to get up the following morning.
“After I say I used to be in an actual unhealthy place, I’d dread waking up day-after-day. These emotions began the day I used to be informed I wasn’t going to be staying on the Dragons,” he mentioned.
“Nervousness and melancholy got here straight at me. It was the realisation that every part I ever needed in my life has come to an finish.
“I keep in mind having a panic assault in coaching while I used to be on the bike.
“I used to be struggling so badly with nervousness that I used to be getting bodily signs, which led to me believing I had a persistent sickness.
“From the March I used to be having fixed panic assaults, I could not depart Newport, could not depart the nation.
“I did not perceive it on the time however now I can see that it was the affect of shedding my contract – spending my total life making an attempt to pursue one dream, that coming to an finish, and having to begin once more. I had to determine who I used to be with out rugby, it was like being stripped of my id.
“It took me some time to achieve out and get assist. For seven months I used to be waking up depressed, anxious, having bodily signs each single day, I used to be in panic that I used to be going to die. It was psychological.”
Greggains is now advocating for change inside the trade, and says gamers should know their price and be supplied extra assist, together with being given job alternatives earlier than they’re let go by their areas. He says this information typically comes with little to no warning, and that that is one thing that should change.
“Everybody is aware of the lifetime of a rugby participant is short-lived, however you are not considering of that when you find yourself 15, 16, 17, giving your all to it week in, week out. You wish to make all of it the way in which, and also you really consider that you’ll,” he defined.
“I used to be a part of the Dragons Academy at Newport Excessive earlier than getting my professional contract, and although there are educational commitments, it’s a ‘do it if you’d like’ mentality.
“I at all times had hope issues would change for me, injury-wise, although deep down I knew they would not.
“The factor is, being a rugby participant is not glamorous. I’ve heard individuals who have by no means been rugby gamers, saying ‘what’s there to moan about, get an actual job’ however except you are somebody incomes silly cash, it isn’t the approach to life folks suppose it’s.
“Sure okay, the hours are good, however a number of gamers are positively not incomes the cash folks suppose they’re, and you’re breaking your physique in course of.
“There are additionally not many different jobs the place you’re worrying about whether or not you will be employed in a number of months time. It’s such a worrying and anxious atmosphere, that you do not perceive except you have been in it.
“You might be so fearful in regards to the future, which you can’t stay within the current.”
For a lot of gamers like Greggains, the preliminary thrill of being seen as a gifted up-and-coming teen quickly wears off, particularly after so many accidents, that are inevitable within the sport.
As a lot as gamers want the expertise and ambition, additionally they want luck.
“The truth is, cash in Welsh rugby is getting worse, and so the quantity of gamers you see incomes good cash is getting decrease and decrease.
“Children, like myself who’ve aspirations to develop into an expert rugby participant, except you are going to be on the prime of your sport, have to actually suppose if it is price it. The sport is just not what it was.
“You see these academy children now, who stick with their areas till they’re 22, incomes little to no cash earlier than being informed there isn’t any future there for them. Then they’re 22 with no expertise to get a job.
“That is what I needed to undergo. At 24 – I needed to undergo what most individuals do when they’re 16, or 18. Due to rugby, you’re left to really feel eight or so years behind everybody else.
“It actually hit me on the time – it was powerful.
“Earlier than Dragons informed me I wasn’t going to be re-signed, I knew myself I needed to maneuver onto the following chapter. I felt defeated from the fixed accidents.
“I used to be prepared to maneuver, however when the coaches really mentioned the phrases, actuality set in. I keep in mind considering, ‘what subsequent?’
“I did not have any route, or any imaginative and prescient, of what I needed to enter. All my desires and ambitions had been taken away.
“I needed to discover one thing that was going to work for me, and I struggled with that essentially the most.
“You do see some rugby gamers who know what they need when their chapter ends, however you see much more who’re so targeted on being one of the best participant they are often in that atmosphere, that they don’t seem to be serious about what’s coming subsequent.
“The not figuring out was scary, I did not know what to do. You are not informed 12 months upfront, and even eight months. You do not have an terrible lot of time to decide. I can not think about what it is like for gamers who’ve a household to supply for.
“You are not solely fearful about cash, your total way of life is getting taken from you. Your regimented routine, seeing the identical folks you have grown up seeing day-after-day because you had been 15. It is lots.
“You are conditioned for that way of life, the boys you have grown up with are your loved ones, and on the finish of the day whether or not folks perceive it or not, being informed ‘that is it, you’re executed, go fend for your self’ is a very onerous factor to take, particularly in your mid 20s.
“At that age, your non-rugby mates are on their very own journey, they’ve discovered the job they like, progressing in that job, however you’re again to sq. one.
Greggains labored as a labourer alongside his teammate Benjamin Fry. He took this position as his confidence was at an all-time low, and he did not consider he may do what he really needed to, which was to develop into a private coach.
“By the point I left the Dragons, I used to be a whole shadow of the particular person I used to be after I was 20. Between the ages of 20 and 24, I misplaced myself utterly.
“When rugby was taken away from me, and I needed to go discover a job. Though I at all times knew I would like to be a coach, I did not have the arrogance to do it.
“So now I’ve left the dragons, taken on a carpentry apprenticeship and from the minute I walked via the door I knew it wasn’t for me.
“I’ve gone from being an expert rugby participant with aspirations of representing my nation, to sweeping somebody’s work bench and cleansing skips.
“I genuinely believed this was what I would be doing for the remainder of my life.
“Now I’m out the opposite aspect, I’m glad it occurred to me in the way in which it did.”
Greggains managed to raised his psychological well being via his devotion to health and focussing on himself. This led him to the trail that he’s on right this moment.
He now performs semi-professional rugby for Merthyr, alongside operating his personal private coaching enterprise, LG Teaching – a job he loves – utilizing his personal experiences to assist folks, and different aspiring younger rugby gamers.
You will discover Lennon on Fb and Instagram, @LG Teaching.
